First-Impression Tips

Guys think they strike out on the first impression because of factors like the way they look or just because the chick wasn’t interested in shooting the bull. In reality, there are several minor details that the average guy fails to pick up on that are ruining his first impression on a woman.

Imagine being able to practice the first impression. Wouldn’t it make approaching and talking to women at bars much easier with the confidence of thousands of first meetings under your belt? You could eliminate all of the odd small talk and uncomfortable pauses in which you’re thinking: ”She didn’t walk away, so what the hell do I say next?”Here are few first impression Tips by Greg Isenberg From MyChanceRomance.com.


Focus on her

Greg sees it much too often: Guys who chat with women but do a hundred other things on their computers or in their rooms instead of paying attention to anything the woman has to say during the conversation. “And don’t forget direct eye contact,” Greg reminds chat users, “but don't stare her down. People don't like when you look at them 100% of the time; it gives them the ‘no’ feeling.”

In real life: When you’re talking to a woman at a bar she should be your main focus. Stop giggling at your friends making faces behind her back, don’t check your cell constantly and never scan around the room for other people to talk to or hit on. Pretend that she is the only person in the place for the next couple of minutes. Keep good eye contact, but don’t stare deep into her eyes. It’s creepy.


Speak like a normal person

“Don’t try and fake it,” Greg explains, “and don't blatantly try to use the same type of language as her. Be cool about it. People feel connected to other people when their language is similar. If she is throwing in some swear words, then you should as well.”

In real life: An important lesson a guy can take from online chat is not to just speak in terms a woman would relate to, but don’t speak in terms she would have little interest in hearing. For example, if the conversation turns to your job, make the explanation as generic and simple as possible. No need to go into every excruciating detail about every facet of your job.


Don't oversell yourself

This seems to be a common and critical mistake in the online chat game. Greg explains: “Don't gloat. Don't get all up in the camera. Don't brag about monetary possessions. A girl can pick up on a guy when he is overselling, and it ruins the fun for her.” Be cool and somewhat mysterious.

In real life: Same principles apply; don’t try too hard to showboat yourself as the perfect guy. This isn’t a job interview. Save the PowerPoint presentation; she will draw her own conclusions about you through the course of the conversation.



Use humor

Greg suggests first feeling out your chat partner to see how far you can take the joking. “Everyone loves a good joke,” he admits, “but it must be in good taste. Feel her out before you start making jokes that poke fun at her though. Poke fun at something she is wearing or something in her room, but it must be in good taste.”

In real life: Ask women the important traits they look for in a guy and they’ll all rattle off “a sense of humor.” It seems so simple -- keep it light and keep it funny. Meeting people is an uncomfortable situation for men and women alike, but if a guy can keep a woman laughing, it eases the tension and shows her that there is probably no need to be worried that he's a lunatic.



Smile

“Be charming and smile,” Greg advises, “but not too big. When someone sees someone else smiling, there is a greater chance she will stick around to continue the conversation.” It creates a good vibe at the start of the chat and it’s harder for a person to just click off for no good reason if the other person seems genuinely nice and well-intentioned.

In real life: You spend all that cash on teeth whiteners, at least show off the fact you’ve got all 32 of your choppers. A simple smile will ease all of her fears that she might not make it out of the bar alive if she shoots you down. Smile when she is talking and look like you are enjoying the conversation -- even if it’s boring you to tears.


Be in the right frame of mind

“It's more important in the offline world to be in the right frame of mind,” Greg explains, “because there is a finite amount of girls. But online, it's infinite.” The success rate will be much higher if you're on a mission and excited about chatting with a woman versus being in a foul mood because life isn’t going according to plan.

In real life: Every visit to the local watering hole doesn’t have to be about picking up women. Sometimes it’s fun to just hang back and watch your friend crash and burn. If you don’t feel like making conversation, no one is forcing you to -- just relax and take in the scene. If the beers loosen you up a little, give yourself a little liquid courage, then by all means start striking up some conversation.


Start a conversation

Much like in real life, cheesy pickup lines are passe. “Cheesy pickup lines faded with the ‘90s. Use a good tone of voice. The best results start with a small compliment to begin the chat. Then get into introducing yourself. This works because the girl feels like she owes you something, after a compliment, so you have a couple minutes to keep her interested and make it work.”

In real life: Besides a witty opening and a well-intentioned compliment, it’s always good to have a back-up plan for where to take the conversation after the “What’s your name? Where you from?” well dries up. Take notice of something about her and bring it into the conversation. Maybe she is wearing a company logo on her jacket or drinking a particular beverage that looks very much like windshield wiper fluid. Start the conversation rolling by asking her questions that may lead to other questions.


Sit up straight

Seeing a guy with bad posture slumped over in a chair on video chat is a big turnoff. First off, it gives her the impression that you’re frumpy and out of shape because your body is doubled over and displaying much girth. Secondly, if you’re this uninterested in meeting her for the first time, what will your nonverbal communications be after a couple dates?

In real life: Drop the invisible suitcases that are weighing your arms and shoulders down and stand at attention. Roll your shoulders back and keep upright. It makes you look even taller and women love a strong, tall male suitor. Remember that your body language and nonverbal cues are incredibly important in first encounters.


Know when to end the conversation

This goes back again to the "hard to get" concept. “Remember to be a little mysterious,” Greg reminds chatters. “Leave her your contact info after things are really good. Leave only after you have introduced yourself, had a little conversation and got a feel for her and she is feeling all tingly inside.”

In real life: Just like you don't have to chat online for hours at a time, a guy doesn't have to monopolize a woman's entire evening by bending her ear for hours on end. She wants to hang out with her friends or maybe even talk to other people over the course of the night. Make a connection, talk for a few minutes, get a phone number and say: "Maybe we will talk later on in the night, but if not, I'll give you a call."

Have a wingwoman
While some might think it odd to have another person in the room while chatting, Greg sees it as a huge advantage to a guy looking to meet new women. “It shows that you are competent enough to have value to another woman. It also reassures the partner that you are not a creep looking for action. However, make sure she does not go on camera too much, they may think she is your wife/girlfriend.”

In real life: It doesn’t hurt to have female friends. Seeing a woman in a group of men is reassuring to other women. If possible, introduce the female friend early in the conversation and make it obvious that the two of you aren’t linked romantically. Mention her in passing and even use her as a conversation starter. Hopefully she starts a conversation with your wingwoman and it keeps her around for a while longer -- long enough for you to figure out how to move this conversation to an online chat because you are so damn nervous.

Monica Bellucci

Megan Fox

Be Irresistible To Women

Let's face it: Hot, interesting women can pick and choose the men they want to date. The problem is most men obsess about things they can't change about themselves like their looks, their car or their job. Truth is, none of that's changing anytime soon, so you need to maximize what you have. Once you know how to do that, you can become irresistible to any woman, even if she seems "out of your league." Check out these few ways to become irresistible to women you dream about right here.


Be romantic

Romance is about more than the run-up to sex; it's also about more than buying her flowers and lighting candles. It's really about looking past the surface of a woman and letting her know that you love what you see. It's about having the imagination to spot opportunities and drop a perfect compliment at the right moment, or tell a fascinating story that shows you know what matters to her. Learn to do that, and you'll become irresistible to women in a way that makes gifts a thing of the past.


Give her the right kind of attention

Women like attention. But interestingly, it’s much better to hint at that kind of attention than to be over the top in demonstrating it. Example: Instead of buying flashy gifts or dropping obvious compliments, try saying: “I was thinking about you today" or "I just wanted to mention that I really like hearing your voice on the phone.” It lets her know she means enough to be in your thoughts when she's not around -- and that's a very powerful way to become irresistible to women.


Be confident
As you all know, women are magnetically drawn to men who show no fear when going after what they want. Problem is, too many guys take "confidence" too far out of fear or insecurity and just come off as arrogant, which is not what I mean here. Women find men irresistible who see something they want, and then go after it in a fearless way without bragging or smack-talking. That kind of confidence drives women wild.


Be adventurous

Nothing is a bigger turn off to a woman than a buzz-kill, so always be open and excited about trying new things, even if it's just trying new food. And if you're passionate about extreme adventures, awesome use it. In fact, dare her to join you on a sunset skydive, even if there's no chance she ever will. It shows the sky's the limit with you, and danger is definitely a major turn on.


Be unpredictable

Sounds like a no-brainer. Women are drawn to men they can’t control or predict. In fact, they absolutely obsess over guys who flirt then don’t call the next day . So make sure to shake things up, even if it's just challenging her to a race down the stairs instead of taking the elevator. Tease and mess with women in ways they didn't expect or haven't seen before. Avoid predictable routines and, above all, never, ever act like every other guy. After all, predictability is only attractive to women when it comes to choosing a husband.


Be thoughtful

Know why women like gifts? It shows you were thinking about them "off the clock," and that's a feeling women need and want. Problem is, gifts will make a woman feel the same inside whether it’s a card or a diamond. But start noticing little details about her and calling them out and she'll melt. If she's wearing a sexy new outfit or lip color, drop a compliment and she'll feel an attraction that no "gift" can make her feel for you.

Demonstrate dominance

Even if you haven't read it in a psychology book, you probably know it in your gut. Women have an unconscious attraction to dominant men. In fact, dominant males in some primate groups account for up to 75% of all the matings and guess what? The rest all sit home alone playing Wii. Seriously, though, the same goes for humans. Although demonstrating dominance never means being overly aggressive, pushy or rude, it does mean taking strong action to get what you want. Try it. You'll become irresistible to women.


Sound smart

You don't have to be a rocket scientist to sound smart. Creativity plus stuff you already know can create powerful attraction with a woman. Even if you know just enough about something to start a conversation, use it to approach a woman and you'll sound smart. Relate it to her and she'll be hooked guaranteed.


Be funny

I say that humor is magic, and it isn't an exaggeration. Humor is the fastest, most powerful way to become irresistible to women, even women you might consider "out of your league." Make a woman laugh, and I don't care how hot or unattainable she seems, you'll trigger positive feelings in her that she just can't ignore. So if you're naturally funny, go with it. If you're not a natural crack-up, it's time to learn. Study online. Read books. Watch live comedy shows. Do whatever it takes, because when you can make her laugh, you become irresistible.

The art of Conversation

Effective flirting depends on solid conversation skills. Whether you're looking for Mrs. Right or Miss Right Now, how you talk to a woman will make all the difference. Luckily, even if you weren't born with the gift of gab there are lots of strategies you can use to improve your conversation skills.

Practice

The only way to improve your conversation skills is through practice. You have to start talking to people, and that doesn't mean calling your sister more frequently. Talking to friends and family is easy. If you want to improve your game, you need to start talking to strangers.

Start off slowly by making small talk with the old lady in the elevator or while waiting on the bank teller. You're not trying to pick these people up, so there won't be any pressure if the conversation goes poorly. Once you get in the habit of striking up conversations with strangers, you'll be less likely to get tongue-tied at the sight of a leggy brunette.

Ask questions

A conversation is not a speech; it's not an opportunity for you to tell her everything there is to know about you. It's not your chance to get something off your chest or bitch about office politics. Your objective, when striking up a conversation, is to get the other person to talk with you. So when you strike up a conversation with a girl, remember to ask lots of questions. questions provides a basis of good conversation, helps you get to know the woman you're talking with, and gives her occasion to talk about herself which all women love. Just remember to ask open-ended questions: "Asking her what her favorite color is neither reflects well on your mental capacity nor does it open the door to an extended discussion." So ask questions that will keep the conversation moving. Ask her about potential travel plans, childhood pets, her ambitions or her friends anything that will get her excited and chatting.


Get her opinion

Of course, the goal of asking questions is to get her opinion. Asking her about her job or favorite movies is OK, but you're not trying to fill in the gaps of her Wikipedia page, you're trying to get to know her. Therefore, make sure your questions are designed to elicit thoughtful or emotional responses, not just lists of things she likes.

Getting her opinion is always good: "Whether you agree or disagree, you can turn it to your advantage. If you agree: You have something in common, and can talk further on the subject. If you disagree: You can start playfully teasing her about her opinion.

Topics to avoid

When meeting a new person, especially a woman you might want to date, there are a number of conversation topics to avoid. First and foremost, don't talk about guy stuff or geeky stuff: Never mention Star Wars, James Bond, comic books, mixed martial arts, wrestling, computers, or porn. Most women aren't interested in those topics, so unless she brings them up first, pretend they don't exist.

Stay away from negative news. Don't bring up the kidnapping you read about in the paper, and don't mention stalking or serial killers. Put yourself in her shoes and never talk about topics that might really freak a woman out. You'll create bad vibes that will make any attraction you've created instantly disappear.Also, never joke about things like stalking or violence. If you creep a girl out, you're toast.

Give her an original compliment

Beautiful women get hit on constantly, especially when they're all dolled up and out at a bar. Stand out from the crowd by giving her an original compliment. you'll get a lot more bang from a compliment she hasn't heard before. Compliment her belt, watch, shoes whatever. The goal is to get her to crack a smile. All it takes is a little observation. Women often dress to be noticed, so try and pick out the thing she wants you to see and comment on it.

Be the Interesting Guy that every woman desire

What do women want? They don’t want to be bored. Sadly, most guys bore women to death, and then wonder why they never get a second date, or a second chance. The solution is to become a deeply interesting guy the kind of guy women love to learn more about and can’t resist being around. Here are few tips to make you more interesting in the eyes of women and to take your success with them to the next level.

Turn everything into an adventure

A fun thing you can do with a woman you just met, believe it or not, is to take her to run errands. It’s something that is nonthreatening, and that almost any woman will go do with you. As long as you have some rapport, a woman will go grocery shopping with you. Simply say: “You know what? I’m going to run down to the store and get some groceries. Come with me -- it’ll be a fun little adventure for us.” Then, when you get to the grocery store, do fun stuff. Go to the magazine rack, pick up a ridiculous magazine, and make fun of some star who was dumb enough to let a photographer get that close. Walk down the aisle, pick up the clam juice, and ask her: “So, what do you think is in here? What the hell is clam juice, anyway?” Everything can be a fun, unpredictable adventure -- if you turn it into one.

Convince her that it will be fun

.We all want to feel something when it comes to the opposite sex. One feeling every woman wants is the feeling of fun. You can make anything fun by simply adjusting your attitude. Whatever you’re about to do, have the attitude of “let’s make this fun.” Why do I use the word "fun?" Go on any online dating site and read a woman's profile; you’ll see that the one thing that women are looking for more than anything else is a “fun” guy. It’s a trait they’re all looking for. So make everything fun -- you have the power to make it happen

Leave her wanting more

One of the ways you can leave her wanting more is to end everything she’s enjoying on an up note. If she asks you to teach her something, teach her something great that she loves; then, when she asks you to teach her more, tell her: “next time.” If you go somewhere really fun with her and she’s having a great time, right at the peak leave to go do something else, or tell her you have to go. When you’re talking to a woman on the phone for the first time, and the conversation is going great, that’s the time to let her know you have to run. This gets her asking herself why you didn’t ask her out, and if she’s going to get to talk to you again. And that’s a beautiful thing for her to be wondering about.

Go back to the basics

On your path to mastery, you’re going to have setbacks. You’re going to be off your game, or you’ll screw up some other area of your life and that’s going to screw up this one. When this happens, go back to the basics; do not act out of desperation. And don’t start looking for some crazy technique to fix things. Stick with the fundamentals, and you’ll ride out the storm. Don’t worry if you don’t understand this now. You will when you need to.

Wait until she comes to you

If you’re in a relationship with a woman you really like, and the relationship starts deteriorating, and you get that feeling that it might end, what should you do? End it. Sit down with her and say: “I’ve been thinking about our relationship lately. I think we both know it’s not heading where we want it to. I care about you a lot as a person. I like you; you’re someone I want to know for a long time, whether we have a relationship or not. But I think it’s best if we take some time off. Let’s end this now and see what happens in the future.” Step back and wait until she comes back to you. Why? If she doesn’t come back to you, then it's likely she would have ended it with you anyway, and that would have messed with your head. In this case, by ending it yourself you have more control and you make it far more likely that it’ll work out in the future. It’s like pulling the “emotional drug needle” out of your arm: It hurts at first because you’re addicted to it, but it’s what you need to do for yourself before bad things happen

Have female friends that are like the women you want to meet

I’ve said before that it’s important to become the kind of guy women like to be around. So here’s a homework assignment: Get three female friends that are like the woman you’d like to meet. Don’t try to date them, just make them your friends. Birds of a feather flock together, which for you means that your new friends will soon introduce you to their attractive, fun-loving female friends -- no pickup lines required.

When you find something she really likes, tease her

There will always be a few things that she really, really likes. It could be a certain kind of food, a certain way you touch her, a certain experience. When you find something she really likes, stop, pull back and make her really want it before you tease her with a little more. This can be the source of her greatest pleasure in the entire relationship.

Make the conversation interesting

Make the conversation an adventure. Learn to tell a great story and find topics that are naturally interesting to talk about. How do you get a better knack for this? It’s simple: Set yourself up in a place where you can hear the conversations women have. Listen to them talking to each other, see if you can notice the commonalities. But there’s a danger here: You don’t want to start acting like a woman’s “girl friend.” Yes, many women like to have gay friends, but that’s not what she really wants -- and it’s not what you want to become. But do listen to conversations to get clues on how you can spice up your chats with women.

Keep developing yourself

The most important thing you can do to become a more interesting guy -- the kind of guy women love to have in their lives -- is to invest in developing yourself. Read books, attend workshops, whatever it takes; get to know yourself, and develop all the different aspects of your life. If you do this, day in and day out, you’ll soon wake up and realize that you’ve become a more interesting person all the way around. You’ll realize you have way more women in your life than you ever had before. Do whatever it takes to make this investment in yourself -- it’ll pays off in spades.

Common Relationship Killers

The dating world is often harsh and chaotic. Finding somebody who is worthy of your time can be a difficult and dirty job. Nonetheless, we are compelled to enter such an unforgiving world for the sake of the desired outcome: a good relationship. Once you’ve found such a coveted gem and settled nicely into a comfortable relationship, you don’t want to throw it all away with a nasty misstep. Below are nine common relationship killers and how to avoid them.

Being critical

It is said that a little constructive criticism can be positive. This is the case, of course, for everybody except your girlfriend. Although suggestions are generally considered acceptable, particularly if she asks for them, putdowns and unwarranted negative input are expected from her mother, not her lover.

If you correct her, tell her how to dress or generally act as though you know best, she will feel nitpicked and self-conscious. Every smart woman knows that she shouldn’t spend her time with a man who doesn’t make her feel good about herself. When in a relationship, be kind and generous, pick your battles, and only give her advice if she asks for it. Also, temper your criticisms with compliments.

Making it obvious that your career comes before her

Your job is important to you, and as such, it’s important to your girlfriend. She’s likely very proud of your successes and wants you to do well. On the other hand, if you start staying late at work every day, if you frequently cancel dates for last-minute business obligations or if you constantly hang out with your coworkers after work hours, she will get ideas about your priorities.

Although a woman appreciates a focused and ambitious man, she also expects you to make time for her. Think of it this way: What fun is having a great career and lots of money if you have nobody to share them with?

Cheating

Physical cheating is never acceptable unless you and your girl have an agreement about such behavior. But cheating isn’t limited only to sexual misconduct -- there is a second type of cheating that can be nearly as hurtful. In this sense, read the word “cheating” as emotional cheating -- committing to somebody else in a girlfriend-y way. This means having a female friend that you relate to better than your girlfriend, that you spend more quality time with or that you enjoy more.

This type of cheating applies to very serious relationships in which your girl would expect full disclosure and sharing. If you’re relating that well to somebody else, chances are you’re short-changing your girlfriend. This doesn’t mean you can’t have other friends or even other really close friends -- it just means that your girlfriend wants to feel like you trust her and confide in her. She doesn’t want to be second-best. And if she is, she’ll notice.

Becoming unkempt

Style is by no means infinitely important, but if you go from GQ to P.U. as soon as you’re comfortable with her, she’ll be sure to keep her distance. This tells her two things: 1. You were just putting on a facade to attract her, and 2. She’s not important enough for you to maintain that facade. If she was attracted to you when you were wearing well-cut suits, chances are that’s what she likes, and she may stop being attracted to you if all you wear are sweats and jerseys. If you’re into sweats and jerseys, that’s how you should go out onto the market.

Being snappy

Now that you and your girl are getting closer, she’s around more. And now that she’s around more, her habits are becoming less novel and charming. You find yourself lashing out at her every so often and talking to her like she’s your little sister. You act as though you’re annoyed by her every move. You’re not, of course, but you just feel comfortable enough to inform her of your preferences -- bluntly.

Unfortunately for you, she probably won’t accept this behavior for a very long period. Instead of being short with her, try to realize when you’re getting annoyed. Then, decide rationally whether this particular annoyance is worth fighting over or not. If it’s not, do your best to leave it alone. If it is, then try to let your girl know calmly. Chances are she’ll be glad to know what bothers you, and she may even have a few suggestions for your habits.

Being controlling

This one is age-old. Many people in relationships suffer from fanatic controlitis. You get jealous of her guy friends. You tell her not to spend so much time gossiping with her girl friends. You tell her she spent too much money at the shoe store. More than anything, you tell her where and when she should go out.

Although women have a reputation for being clingy, they also enjoy their independence. Chances are your girlfriend lived her life pretty successfully before you entered the picture. It is equally likely that she can still manage her own time and money without your help. There are situations in which she may want your input or advice, but otherwise, don’t be pushy with advice or demands. Instead of demanding time, ask for it. Unless you want her to duck out when she sees you coming into a room, you have to give her space and let her make her own decisions.

Judging her friends and family

If you find her friends, her sister and her mother annoying, you’re going to have an awfully hard time. They’re going to be around quite often, and she’ll talk about them even more. It’s important to try to see what she sees in them. If her posse is a bit shallow, try to find some substance, and if her mother is overbearing, try to realize she just wants to help. You have to understand that these people are her foundation and that she’ll be very defensive about them. If you try to see the good things in them, you might actually start to like them.

Also, avoid direct confrontation with all her favorite people, even if they egg you on. Do your best to get along with those closest to her because fights with them will translate into fights with your girl. If you can, become their favorite guy; it’ll pay dividends in the end.

Becoming disinterested

Men often believe that the way to attract women is to be aloof. Even if that works in the beginning, it is certainly not the case once you become serious in a relationship. Your woman remembers what it’s like to be wooed. She’s also keenly aware of the fact that if you don’t pay attention to her, a lot of other men will. If you stop complimenting her, stop taking her out or asking about her life, she will feel neglected. Recognize that she doesn’t have to be around you; you have to make it worth her while. If you want to keep her around, you need to make her feel like she’s special. Look her in the eye. Call her in the middle of the day from time to time. When you think she looks pretty, tell her.

Not making time for her

You promised Joe you’d watch the game with him. You haven’t been to the gym enough lately. You have to run errands. Although you may want to do all of the things you did when you were a bachelor, you also have to make time for your girl. It’s tough, but sometimes you and your girl will both have to give up time with pals in order to spend time together.

If you want to keep a woman around, you should make her feel important, special and competent. Any of the behaviors listed above will indicate that you’re taking her for granted and if there’s anything a woman hates, it’s being taken for granted. So make those small gestures; after all, if she’s worth keeping, it shouldn’t even feel like an effort to you.